Oh, Lord. It's too much for me! The deep desire to love me and be with me in spite of me and the length that you go to make it possible. Thank you, Jesus for teaching us how to pray, for teaching us forgiveness and then dying so that forgiveness can be ours and we can forgive others.

Thank you for a love that is conditional, but not on me. That nothing can for sin atone- nothing but the blood of Jesus.

God that you could love and forgive and bless sinful, weak men like Abraham because you were looking ahead to the blood that your son would shed on the cross for them- and in so doing your blessing that was conditioned on Jesus' blood paved the way for the Savior's own bloodline. My GOD! My GOD! Lord, it's almost too much to take in.

You have done it and you still do it and you will do it. Lord, as I read how you work, how you reveal yourself in the old old Scriptures and in the face of Christ, I can't help but think you are just crazy sometimes. Instead of going to the most religious, moral men you can find, you scrounge up guys like Levi- the Benedict Arnold outcast of society who sells out his people for a comfortable life and then cheats them. God! Why?! Why do you come to Levi- what have you come to show? I thank you that the book on you was not written by religious people but by you! Who would think of a God who does this?

You are so far above me that the only way I can be with me is if you just decide to look past my imperfection. And that's what you do and I LOVE YOU FOR IT!!!

The God of the Old Testament

I want to breeze past the fact that I am reading through the bible chronologically this year and move forward to the what I've been getting out of it.

Honestly, it has been so good for my soul reading through Genesis so far. This time through the Bible, I'm trying to focus on God. I know that sounds silly, but I think with all the action, the constant character changes, and plotlines, it's easy to get wrapped up and focus on the details of the story and lose track of the most important thing in the bible- its Author.

I don't think I remember being this encouraged from the Word in a long time. Contrary to the moralistic versions of Old Testament stories that I grew up with (like be a good person and God will bless you- look at all these examples...) I've started to see the stories for what they are: God just choosing the sometimes seemingly arbitrary, sometimes morally repugnant people to bless.

Look at the stories. God chooses and then God blesses. That's it. Sure, there's decisions made and consequences for good and bad decisions, but the biggest thing that I've seen is that if you are chosen by God, you simply cannot escape his blessing. If he sets his sight on you to love, I'm sorry but there's no option but to be loved. If you are in a covenant with him, there is nothing that you can do to avoid love and blessing.

One example that was encouraging to me was that of Abraham. Check out what happens. God chooses. He tells Abe that he's going to bless him. He even makes a covenant with him, and in an old school/old testament way says, "If I should break this covenant, may I die."

RIGHT after that, we get a story about old Abe being not so honest. In an action that reeks of distrust in the Lord, he pretends that his wife is his sister. Right after God promised he'd go with him! Right after the covenant! And what does God do? Break the deal, looking for someone with just a little more faith and spiritual fidelity? No, God does just what he promises to do. He saves Abraham from his stupid decision and then he blesses him.

He does this throughout Abraham's life (see the second time he does this or the incident with Ishmael). Now, you might say, "Hey, but look at the great faith and trust of Abraham when asked to sacrifice his son. This is his great choice and is why he is commended." To which I would simply reply- yes!!! He is made great- because of God's choice to bless him and love him and save him from his own faults.

SO, for you new covenanters, heirs of an even richer promise than Abraham himself, what does this mean? What does it mean that God's love is inescapable? That he does not bless everyone, but for those he chooses, there is no other option than blessing? That his love is relentless? Furious? Not conditional on you at all? That he has chosen to bless you and there's nothing that you can do wiliingly or unwillingly, no stupid decision, no moment of weakness, no distrust, no lack of faith that you can exude to escape from it?

What joy for those whose hope is in the name of the Lord.

I LOVE this quote.

I have taken my good deeds and bad deeds and thrown them together in a heap, and fled from them both to Christ, and in him I have peace."
David Dickson

Boredom

Here's a thought. Is the word boredom going to even make sense in 20 years? Does it make sense now?

Life

Life: what a crazy thing we do.

E-books

I have many thoughts on e-books. Here's just a few:

1. It would be nice to be able to search through my books to find passages
   
2. I think the real book is one of the best technologies that we've come up with: Infinite battery life, super-durable, ergonomically comfortable, smells good, able to make comments in the margins freely and in the inside cover of the book.
   
3. Sometimes it just feels like with technology we pour tons of money and effort into creating something that's not as good as what we already have that requires no electricity. Is this the case?
   
4. Do we lose something with the e-book?
   
5. Would I destroy a kindle as I am generally tough on my books (and electronics)?
   
6. It would be sweet to have my library on me at all times.
   
7. It would be sweet to get a bunch of free e-books.
   

A link and a vid:
The differences between the book and the e-book.

Settlers

If you haven't played Settlers, you haven't lived. I still remember the first time hearing about the Settlers of Catan freshman year at the U. As my freshman CA, Josh Mathews, gushed about it (along with the wider U of M Campus Crusade community), I was less than intrigued. I really don't generally get too into board games. Most just really don't engage me.

Then, I played it. And I played it again... ad nauseum. Then I got it for Christmas... and it swept the town of Pelican Rapids for a summer. It really is that fun.

Here's an article from the Washington Post on how Catan is the game of our time.